Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles (PG)

The heroes in a half shell have been in a form of cinematic hibernation ever since 1993’s appalling sequel Turtles in Time. Now, I am fully aware that it is the Testudo, which is the Latin name for Tortoise that hibernates, but the comparison was needed to exemplify the fact that there is nothing plodding about this CGI rebirth of the early 90’s phenomenon.
Director Kevin Munroe follows the lead of recent cinematic resurrections (Superman Returns, Batman Begins) by having our Pepperoni loving foursome at a fractured and decimated point in their sewer dwelling existence. Leonardo has gone feral in the jungles of Central America; Raphael has taken it upon himself to become a metal coated vigilante called Nightwatcher; Michelangelo has resorted to living off reputation by being a children’s entertainer and turtle headed piñata, and finally Donatello works telephone sales. With The Shredder defeated and a team ethos that not even Zen-like sage Splinter (voiced by original turtles stalwart, the late Mako) can mend it’s going to take more than a meal deal with free 2 litre bottle to reunite our reptilian mutants.

The first thing to emerge from the dusty shell left by the original movies is the look of the film; initially slightly disconcerting in its Saturday morning hyper-cute rendering you can't help but be won over by the strikingly polished sheen to the visuals. The stand-out scenes are a kinetic ride through the sewer system with Michelangelo astride his skateboard, and a beautiful rain soaked roof top showdown between Leonardo and Raphael set against a neon background. Few films this year will match the look of TMNT.

Continuing with the already exhausted turtle metaphors, TMNT's major problem is that beneath the hard outer casing lays a very soft and vulnerable plot. A promising historical set-up narrated by Lawrence Fishburne to no particular benefit hints at mythos on a grand scale but that is quickly dispatched for a catch the monster, save the world storyline. Themes from the previous movies, notably the original 1990 outing (which, for fact fans, was at the time the highest grossing independent movie ever) are also recycled, Raphael’s anarchistic streak being the obvious example. You can understand the filmmakers wanted to introduce the themes to a new audience but surely the millions of lunchboxes and action figures are enough to suffice the younger demographic because with TMNT there is a built-in audience that will be surfing the wave of 80s nostalgia in the year that Die Hard makes a return and The Transformers finally arrive that should guarantee a future for this franchise.

The filmmakers have also made sure that they respect the source material they are working from. Leonardo and Co. have been given a muscle-bound makeover but they retain the accents that fans will find familiar, and although possibly due to the younger orientation of the movie they hardly use them, each turtle is equipped with the weapon with which they were synonymous.

With an ending that promises more adventures from the colour-coded superheroes, a dash of (albeit juvenile) humour, and the aforementioned stunning visuals, this is a step in the right direction towards a darker, edgier future. Dare I say it? Cowabunga Dudes! Sorry.